


Letters to Scorpius

by shushumimi123



Series: The world from Draco's eyes [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Baby Scorpius, Dad Draco, F/M, Grandparent Lucius and Narcissa, Major Illness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-02-15 10:12:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13028871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shushumimi123/pseuds/shushumimi123
Summary: A series of letters about the ups and downs of Scorpius Malfoy's life written through the eyes of Draco Malfoy- the father who wants nothing but the best for his most precious child





	1. Welcome home

**Author's Note:**

> The second part of this series. Hope you enjoy and suggestions and criticisms are welcome.
> 
> (Here is the first part of this series- The Day Draco Malfoy was Saved) https://archiveofourown.org/works/13001055

"Alright, Mrs. Malfoy. You're all set. Now remember, bed rest for three days," the Nurse said as Astoria set the quill back into the ink pot, signing the last of the parchment for her discharge. She turned back to Draco where he waited by the wall, carrying Scorpius in his midnight blue carrier. Draco was smiling down at Scorpius, gently rocking their baby before looking up and noticing Astoria walking towards them. "Ready to go, love?"

  
Draco nodded and adjusted their overnight bag over his shoulder and took her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Of course," he hummed and led them to the end of the reception to the fireplaces. He stepped into one with his family and watched Astoria grab a handful of Floo powder and shout "Malfoy Manor" before dropping it.

  
Draco remembered squeezing his arm around her waist and tightened his grip on the carrier's handle. It was only a moment of weightlessness before they both landed, looking out of the fireplace into the familiar study, where on the couches Lucious and Narcissa sat.

  
"Just on time as always," Narcissa said and stood up, meeting Astoria as she stepped out, guiding her to sit down. But that was all Draco paid attention to because as soon as he stepped out of the fireplace, he gently placed the carrier on the floor and knelt down to unbuckle Scorpius. He used his wand to sweep off any soot from his body before holding Scorpius close, assessing him with worrisome eyes. He knew the floo wasn't the best option, but he wanted to get home as soon as possible. When Scorpius gurgled and shifted around in his blanket, but didn't cough, nor was he covered in a single speck. He had been completely protected by the carrier and the dozen of protective charms Draco had placed on it.

  
"Son, why don't you stop hogging your child and present him to his grandparents," Lucius drawled, his expression the usual disinterested, though Draco couldn't understand why but he was not surprised.

  
"Of course, father," he said and got up. He turned to see Narcissa move from Astoria's side and go to sit next to her husband. Draco waited for her to settle before handing the small bundle to her.

  
Draco took a step back as he watched Narcissa slowly pull the blanket away to expose the adorable sleeping face and for a moment everyone was silent and smiling. Even his father. "He is so precious," Narcissa whispered, breaking the silence.

  
Lucius nodded in agreement, shifting closer to get a closer look. "He truly is,"

  
Draco bit the inside of his cheeks to stop himself from smiling too hard. But it was hard not to. He was so proud of having the most perfect baby in the world, and everyone could see that. Draco turned around and walked over to Astoria, sitting by her side and placed his hand on her lower back. "You did it," he whispered into her ear as he gently rubbed her back.

  
Draco watched her smile fondly and rolled her eyes before resting her head on his shoulder. "We did it," she added.

  
Draco didn't protest, but he couldn't agree with her. He had done nothing. She was the one who carried that boy for nine months with all the pain and illness along with the hours of labour that came after. Draco had done nothing. Just stood on the sidelines, offering not nearly as much as he wishes he could've. He didn't deserve to share the work with her. Even in the hospital she was so calm and composed every time Scorpius cried and allowed herself to trust the staff around as they took Scorpius in and out of the room for various tests. Draco, on the other hand, froze every time Scorpius cried and had to follow Scorpius around the rooms, despite knowing the staff very well. How could Draco be considered on the same level when Draco felt as though he could only be a bumbling fool of completely shut off when it came to their son. 

  
"Draco," Astoria whispered, placing her hand on his chest. Draco blinked a bit and turned to her, not having realized he had zoned out.

He glanced at his parents were still mesmerized by their child and finally answered her. "Yes?"

  
"Why don't you take me upstairs. I better get started on my bedrest." She didn't wait for Draco to answer before getting up and pulling Draco to his feet. Astoria turned to Narcissa and Lucius. "If you excuse us. The Healers ordered that I have complete bed rest for three days. So, I must excuse myself. It was so nice seeing you two again. I will see if I am fit enough to join you all for dinner," she added and leaned down to kiss both of Narcissa's cheeks and nodded her head towards Lucius.

  
Draco wrapped his arm around her waist, glancing down at their son as they walked past them and out of the study. He hated to admit it, but even now in his own home, even when Scorpius was with his parents, he already missed him. He turned back to Astoria and raised his eyebrow at her. "It was not complete bed rest," he said, remembering quite clearly was the Healer said.

  
Astoria nodded and rested her weight on him as she reached her hand to hold onto the stair railing while they made their way up. "I know. But we need to talk."

  
"About?" Draco asked slowly. His mind tried to figure out what there was to say in private. But all he could think of was by no means worthy of excusing herself so suddenly.

  
"About you," she said bluntly as she pulled back from him just enough to walk into their bedroom. She walked in as graceful as always, slipping out of her kitten heels before settling herself on the bed. She pulled out her wand from her pocket and with a slow twist of the wrist, her nightgown floated across the room towards her.

  
 "Me? What have I done this time?" he asked as he closed the door. Draco made his way to sit on the bench of the vanity, watching his wife change, leaning back and rested his elbow against her tabletop. Draco was not one to gravel in his insecurities- often. But not indeed when it came to his wife. Their relationship was balanced. Neither Astoria nor Draco had ever done something to anger the other.

  
Astoria got into the bed and pulled the blanket over her lap and looked at him. "You're scared. You need to be more confident in your ability to be a good father."  
Ah. There it was again. The same conversation from the night she delivered. Draco didn't understand how she could see straight through him, even when he had not realized what he was doing. Was he so poor at hiding his emotions?

  
"I don't believe I understand. I feel I am perfectly capable of being a good father," Draco answered, his voice smooth and unbothered.

  
Astoria raised her eyebrow at him, and Draco knew his charade was up. Draco turned away from her and sighed, running his hand over his mouth as he thought. "I don't know what it is, Astoria. I feel afraid that I might... break him and hurt him by just being me. He's so small and fragile, and I only want what's best for him. I love him so much, and I want to give him the best life." Draco spilled out his feelings to her, and he immediately felt lighter. He glanced at his wife again before facing her. Crossing his legs with his hands neatly folded in his lap.

  
Astoria was looking down at her lap, paying close attention to his words by the look on her face. She then looked up at him and smiled. The type of smile that took Draco's breath away. "You are seriously foolish; you know that?"

  
Draco was about to protest, but she held her hand up to him, quickly shutting him down "You contradict yourself, Darling. You say you might hurt him, but you love him so much and want just to make him happy. Look," she said and sighed, her eyes flicking to the door, and Draco knew what and who she was referring to. "I know Lucius is not one to take an example from. But do everything you wished he would've done for you and you'll be amazing."

  
Draco deflated a bit and sighed. "It's not as easy as that, Astoria. What if I turn into him? Turn into a sour man and take it out on Scorpius unintentionally," he explained, the fear of the unknown consuming him. It always did. From the moment he realized his father fought for the wrong side in the war to now. It was a fear he lived with every day.

  
Astoria frowned at him and patted the bed next to her. "Come here," she said, her voice soft and gentle. Draco nodded and stood up from the bench and shortened the distance between them and sat on the bed, placing his hand on the blanket, allowing her to set her own over his.

  
"You are not going to end up like your father, you hear? You-" Astoria cut herself off and stared off into the room, thinking. "You could write," she suggested, looking back at him and shrugged.

  
"Write? Write what?" Draco asked and had to fight the urge to roll his eyes at her. It certainly did feel that she was now just babbling anything that came to mind.

  
"Write letters," she continued, sitting up a bit now, her confidence in her plan shining through. "Yes. Write letters to Scorpius. Write about how much you love him and care about him and of his good and bad times. Let those letters remind you what you're fighting for, Draco." Astoria gently brushed her thumb against his hand.

  
Draco watched her fingers and let the thought sink in. It wasn't the worst idea, and it wouldn't hurt to try. He nodded slowly and looked back at her. "Alright, I'll give it a go."

  
Astoria's face broke out into a radiant grin, and she leaned over to kiss his cheek. "Perfect. And if it doesn't help, we'll revisit this conversation and see what to do next. Now, go back down to our baby and let me rest," she said, her smile still evident as she shifted around to lay down.

  
Draco let a soft chuckle escape from his lips and nodded. "Alright, love," he said and leaned over to kiss her head before getting up and walked out of the room. Draco carefully closed the door before letting out a heavy sigh. Writing? It felt silly, but he promised her he'd try and he had never broken a promise to her.

  
Draco headed back down the stairs and back to the study, where he could hear Narcissa speaking mixing with Scorpius' soft cooing. The sounds made him smile. He knew that if anything, Scorpius would have two beautiful and strong women to depend on.

  
"Sorry to keep you waiting," Draco announced as he walked back in. His parents hadn't moved from the position from before, but now Lucius was the one holding Scorpius, with an expression of slight interest as Scorpius held onto his finger and cooed.

  
Lucius looked up at him and shook his head slightly before turning his attention back to his grandson. "No, bother. We are keeping ourselves occupied."

  
Narcissa used her fingers to cover her mouth as she smiled and watched her husband. Her eyes turned back up and reached out and guiding Draco to sit next to her. "Quite. Scorpius is certainly a cheery baby."

  
Draco sat down and leaned over slightly, his chest feeling warm at the sight of his baby's chubby face taking in the world in with no fears or fuss. He certainly had that best baby.

  
Narcissa leaned back and turned to him. "Sorry we weren't able to come to the hospital," she whispered. "It took longer than expected to leave Romania."  
Draco nodded and placed his hand on hers. "It's alright. But will you be going back soon?"

  
Narcissa frowned and nodded. "Yes. We'll need to be back by the end of the day. Your father still has a lot of work to do," she said before reaching over to lightly pinch Scorpius' cheek a soft grin forming on her lips.

  
Draco was so pleased to see that his parents- both parents loved his son so much. He knew his mother would always be supportive, but his father had been a different story. He didn't want him to be cold nor distant to his child, knowing far too well what emotional setbacks that would cause. But seeing him here, with his son was more than Draco could've asked for.

  
The three of them sat like that for a while. Lucius and Narcissa were going back and forth to hold Scorpius and amuse him while Draco patiently watched, knowing that he had his whole life to carry him and not to be impatient.

  
But it wasn't long before Scorpius started to get red and with a disgruntled expression started to cry. Lucius- who was holding him was physically shocked and held him out at arm's length, unsure what to do. Draco didn't know it, but he had the same expression, reaching out, pleased that Lucius held no objection to passing his grandchild away. Draco kept him close to his chest and gently bounced him. "My boy, what is wrong? Are you alright?" he whispered as he brought his son's face close to his own.

  
Narcissa, who had been smiling cheekily at the two men, leaned over to Draco, speaking over his shoulder. "He'll be hungry by this time," she said quietly.

  
Draco looked over his shoulder, and his racing mind started to calm down. "Right, of course," he said and walked over to the carrier and in one of the compartments pulled out a bottle. He wrapped his hand around it, making sure the enchantment still kept it warm and fresh. "Alright, my boy. Just relax," he said and sat back on the couch, pulling the cap off with his fingers before holding the end to his baby's mouth, sighing in relief when Scorpius started to suckle, his cries stopping immediately.

  
"A bottle? Why aren't you taking him to Astoria?" Narcissa questioned. "I thought we all agreed we all agreed on breastfeeding," she added, her lips pursed together.

  
Draco nodded, his eyes fixated on his son. "We did. This is her breastmilk. We decided bottles would be more convenient from time to time," he answered, hearing the tone of his mother's voice. He loved both her and Astoria, but it was no secret the two butted heads occasionally, especially when it came to motherhood.

  
Lucius watched his wife try to restrain herself and placed his hand on her knee. "Narcissa. You can bring this up to Astoria at a later date," he said, surprisingly calm.

  
Both Draco and Narcissa looked up at him. Both wearing questing looks. "That was quite diplomatic of you, dear. How come?" Narcissa asked.

  
Lucius gave them both a pointed look before turning away and getting up. "As long as he isn't screaming his lungs out for going hungry, I do not care how his milk is delivered," he said and straightened out his robe. "Come, the elves should have tea served in the parlour," he said and started to walk away from the three of them.

  
Draco watched him go before turning to his mother, smiling at her. "He's got the point, you know," he said and got up carefully, making sure not to shift Scorpius around too much.

  
Narcissa let out a sigh and nodded. "I suppose so," she replied and got up as well. Draco watched her meet her husband at the door before they both walked to the parlour. Draco took this time to pull the bottle away, giving Scorpius a rest for a moment. "You are so loved, my boy. I hope that this will last forever. But no matter what, your mother and I will always love you more than anyone else in the world" he whispered and kissed the top of his head, and as Draco lowered the bottle back to his tiny mouth, he could've sworn he was smiling.

  
Draco had fed Scorpius two more times and changed his diaper a total of four times by the end of the day. He was carrying his sleeping baby against his chest with a blanket to cover him as both him and Astoria waved off Narcissa and Lucius after dinner was over. Once the two apparated, the couple hurried inside and let one of the house elves lock up.

  
Astoria yawned and sighed. "Gosh, I can't believe I'm still tired," she said and lifted her dinner dress as she followed her husband upstairs to retire for the night.  
"Well, you are supposed to be on complete bedrest," he mused as he splayed his hand over Scorpius' back, gently rubbing it to keep him asleep.

  
"Not complete bedrest," she teased back, and when they reached the top, Astoria reached out to Scorpius. "Let me put him to bed. I feel lost not seeing him most of the day."

  
Draco felt reluctant to hand his baby to her, mainly because the weight of him on his chest was so comforting, plus how could he part from the most precious thing to him?. "Are you sure, love? You're tired, and he's already asleep."

  
Astoria raised her eyebrow at him before a smirk grew on her lips. "Don't worry dear. Tonight if you're on night duty, remember," she said and leaned up to kiss him.

  
"Right," he said and couldn't help but smile. Even the proposition of having to wake up multiple times a night for his baby seemed terrific to him. "Alright," he said and ever so gently pulled Scorpius away from his chest, holding him in his arms for a moment, basking in his son's cuteness. Draco leaned over and kissed his face, peppering a few more. "Goodnight, my sweet boy. I love you," he whispered against his cheek before planting another kiss and handed him to Astoria.

  
Astoria was smiling at them as she took Scorpius and gently wrapped him up as she cradled him in one arm. "God, look at us. I never thought I would love someone more than you," she said and glanced up at Draco.  
  
Draco stood beside her and continued to have his eyes fixated on their boy. "Same," he breathed out. He then turned to her and found her smiling right back. With a beat, he leaned over and pecked her lips. "But you're a close second," he teased.  
  
A laughter erupted from her before Astoria quickly covered her mouth, hoping she didn't wake up Scorpius. "Well, so are you," she bit back and relaxed. "This is good. I'm glad we're on the same page."  
  
"Me too," Draco whispered.  
  
Astoria yawned again and stepped back towards the nursery. "Well, I better put him to bed," she said. Astoria then took Scorpius' tiny arm and lifted it up, waving it to Draco. "Goodnight, dad," she said in a silly baby voice.

  
Draco gave her a crooked grin and shook her head lovingly. "You are too much," he said and leaned over to kiss her temple before letting them go. He stood there for a moment with his hands in his pocket, watching as Astoria stepped into his nursery. He wished he could follow them, but decided against it. He knew she was going to nurse him one last time before going to sleep and she wanted some bonding time with him. And as a Healer Draco knew how important the bond between a mother and baby were.

  
With a heavy sigh, Draco made his way back to the bedroom. He closed the door behind him and started to undress, closing his eyes as he raised his wand to change himself out of his dinner suit into his night clothes. Draco walked to his side of the bed and laid down. He stared up at the ceiling with his hands rested on his abdomen as he recalled the day.

  
His son. His Scorpius was two days and fifteen hours old. He was no longer than his forearm and had fed well that day. But then why, when everything went so smoothly did his chest hurt? Draco furrowed his brows and rubbed his chest. He knew why but he didn't want to admit it. He was afraid. He was afraid that there would come a day when things don't go smoothly. A day when his mother and wife will argue or a day when his father is harsh or a day where he himself might be cold and unforgiving. The idea of anything hurting his child made him sick the stomach, but the fear of being a source of that pain made his whole body ache from his heart, out. Draco had to keep himself in check. He couldn't let outbursts that may come go unnoticed. Its those times of rage he had to remind himself of the good in his son. The promise of the best life he made to him that morning he was born.

  
Draco anxiously tapped his finger against his body as he glanced at the door. He knew Astoria was still with Scorpius and did not want to be disturbed. But being alone with his thoughts was nerve-wracking. What would Astoria say if she was with him, offering him her loving guidance? Of course, Draco knew what she would say.  
Draco pushed himself up and looked over at his writing desk in the corner of the room. He hadn't written at that desk for a while now, the only writing he did was business, and he always preferred to do that in his study. But it was far too late to go down, and Draco felt that this kind of writing deserved to be done in a more informal area of the house.

  
Draco grabbed his nightgown and slid the silk over his shoulder and loosely tied it as he walked over. Draco rolled up the hood and found everything perfectly intact, undisturbed from the last time he opened this up. He drew out the chair and sat down and reached out to open his inkpot, placing the lid on the side as he brushed his hand along the peacock quill. He then leaned back and opened the long drawer in the middle, pulling the end of the parchment and dragging it along the top of the table and clipping it to the top, ensuring it would not slip while he wrote.

  
Draco looked down at the empty parchment, the marbled page looking right back expectantly. Well, if the paper could have emotion, that is.

  
Draco took in a deep breath and exhaled. It was now or never. He just hoped by the end of this; he would feel better. Draco reached out and picked up his quill, dipping it into his ink, tapping away the excess and held it to the top of the parchment and began to write.

 

 _Dear Scorpius,_  
_I write this letter to you to remind myself of the ups and downs I may face with you, though any memory with you is and forever will be dear to my heart. I hope when this letter is one day opened by you, you may find joy in reading your life through my eyes. My only wish is that we will be close enough that these feelings I pour out onto these pages will not surprise you and even when I am one day gone, these letters will stay with you and along with my memory bring you comfort._

 

Draco pulled back and dipped his quill in his ink and blinked several times as he got a bit teary. When had he become so dramatic? Talking about a day when Scorpius would read felt far too into the future, let along a day when he will pass on. 

 

_As I write this to you know, you are two days and sixteen hours old, marking the first night out of the hospital. So, I suppose this letter can be seen as your welcome home..._

 

 


	2. Anxieties

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco heads back to his first day of work since Scorpius is born. His mind is not where it should be and Draco tries to go unnoticed until he is called out by a fellow Healer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: descriptions of anxiety

_Dear Scorpius,_  
_As I sit here, writing this letter in your nursery with you sleeping against my chest, I am reminded how lucky I am to have you. Regardless of having the most horrid day, your presence always seems to wash the darkness away with the light in your eyes and the with the sound of your laughter._

 

"Are you sure you'll be alright?" Draco asked as he adjusted his tie, glancing over at his wife through the mirror. It was one month and five days precisely since Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy was born and Draco found it more painful than ever to leave his child and wife alone to return to work for the first time.

"We'll be alright, love," Astoria reminded him for the hundredth time that morning as she gently cradled Scorpius in her arms as she rocked in her chair. "All the elves are with me, and Daphne will be flooing in this afternoon to meet him."

Draco pursed his lips together and nodded. "Yes, Daphne," he drawled. His relationship with his sister-in-law becoming quite stiff after she insisted she was "too busy to meet a person who can't even hold a conversation." A pathetic excuse to not meet her nephew if anyone asked him.

"I'll be back at nine. I don't want you to wait up for me if you're tired," Draco said, changing the conversation back to them. He slid on his white Healer's cloak while striding across the room to kneel in front of the chair.

"Alright, Scorpius. Papa is leaving for work now. Will you be a good boy for mummy and not make a fuss," he asked as Astoria held Scorpius lower for both of them to get a good look at each other. Scorpius had let out a delighted coo at his father.

Draco's expression was soft as he gazed upon his son. He was so perfect. Scorpius had already started making noises, and following people with his eyes and Draco felt proud. He could remember just holding him the moment he was born, being so small and pink. And now look at Scorpius. He was already so smart and growing into the cutest baby out there.

"Bye, Papa. Have fun saving people's lives," Astoria cooed in her silly baby voice as she took her son's arm and waved. Scorpius started making a displeased noise and wiggled his arm away, having him minding his own business studying his father's face before the intrusion.

Draco laughed at both his wife and child. A laugh he had only recently learned he was capable of. "If you keep that up, I will never make it out the door," he said, looking up at his wife and noticing how her eyes sparkled as she watched him. Draco fell silent for a moment and stared back.

Her blue eyes were catching the light of dawn and emitted it towards him, as though blessing him with the strength to carry on. "I'm going to miss your laugh," she whispered suddenly before looking down at Scorpius, who had started to coo at Draco. "And I believe so will he," she continued, biting the inside of her cheek to stop her grin from being too broad.

Draco felt his chest warm at the compliment and leaned over to peck a sweet kiss on the corner of her lips before turning back to Scorpius. He reached out, and with the gentlest touch, he placed his hands on either side of his face and leaned down to kiss his forehead, nose, chin and both cheeks. The sensation in his chest grew ten-fold as Scorpius let out the most adorable laugh, filling the silence of the bedroom with pure bliss.

"Well, I best be off now," he said, allowing his fingers to brush against the soft, rosy cheeks of his baby as he stood.

He watched Astoria get up with mild difficulty and quickly reached over to place a hand on her back and the other holding her arm to help her up. She was quick to shrug him off, and Draco sighed. "I'm going to call for another house visit. You should be back to full health by now," he said. Ever since she gave birth, her recovery has been slow. Too slow for Draco's liking. The Mediwizard that has been visiting her even brought up some concerns during his last visit. Concerns that have been eating Draco up. "Actually, I want you to come see the specialist," he said, wanting to play it safe. "I'll book you an appointment."

Astoria held Scorpius to her chest and frowned at Draco. "I'm fine, love. I just gave birth. Give me some time," she said and placed her hand on his arm with a reassuring smile before the two walked downstairs. Draco had caught every he could to lean in to press another kiss on Scorpius' face. And when they reached the front door, Draco took Scorpius in his arms for a moment and held him close to his face; his lips pressed his head as he whispered "I love you, my sweet boy," before handing him back to Astoria and took a step back outside. He watched as Astoria made his little boy wave at him again and waved back before apparating.

The day felt unbalanced if Draco was completely honest. He had gotten used to being at home, wondering the halls shirtless with Scorpius against his chest as he showed him all the paintings and statues. Despite getting teased by his wife, Draco knew and insisted it was the ideal way for a father and baby to bond - fathers not having the nine-month headstart a mother does. Oh, how he missed the weight of his baby on his chest as he slept.  
But here, at work, where none of that was allowed. Draco had to keep his face calm and composed as he patched wounds, made stitches, undid curses and deal with the daily "I'm not being treated by a Death-Eater" speech. Draco had forgotten how exhausting his job was, but it was worth it because at the end of the day each life he heals is one less person who will tie him and his son to their family's shameful past. Hopefully.

"You seem tense," one Healer- Ms. Bones- mentioned, suddenly appearing behind him out of the blue. She stood beside him by the reception, using her wand to summon a file as Draco paused momentarily from signing a patient's discharge papers and asking himself what on Earth possessed her to talk to him in such an accusing way.

"Do I now?" he asked, his voice calm, though his insides were far from it. Every so often his mind would spring up a thought that would pull him back to a feeling similar to the war and mix in with his worries of his son being home without him. It was as though he was seeing imagines of Scorpius being trapped in the cross-fire. That, above all, was the most exhausting part of the day.

"It's all over your face. You're not focused. You're somewhere else," Ms. Bones pointed out, the tip of her wand an inch away from his cheek, the gesture making him flinch. She quickly lowered it and gave him an apologetic look and resumed the conversation, her eyes now scanning her file. "Where are you, Mr. Malfoy? Home perhaps?"

Draco stopped pretending to read the parchment in front of him and glanced at her just for a moment. "Perhaps," he shot back, feeling a bit territorial for his emotions. He knew he was doing a splendid job at hiding them, but Ms. Bones knew him better than that. They had graduated together, and she became a successful Mental Healer after so many the survivors of the war became her patients. One of them being Draco. When their sessions took place- in a proper setting, mind you- Draco was good at being composed and dignified. Explaining his emotions with a steady head, as though speaking to her about a third party, Healer to Healer.

However, this time around, Draco found it a bit difficult to contain himself. He felt like he wanted nothing more than to be at home, with his son who was growing more and more every day. And with his wife who feels weak in the mornings and is now finding it difficult to breastfeed; the most straightforward sign that a mother's body wasn't at its optimum health. How could Draco leave them alone? Who was he to tend the wounds of strangers when his wife and child could be in pain and suffering? Draco placed his hand on the counter and held onto the edge and took a deep breath through his nose. He was fine. He was just a bit winded coming back to work in full force after one month. That's all. Nothing more.

"Relax, Mr. Malfoy," Ms. Bones whispered. She reached over and placed her hand on his shoulder, causing him to stiffen, though she did not pull away. "I know you will find this highly unprofessional to diagnose you here and now. But with your history, I think you're suffering from separation anxiety," she whispered, having leaned close to ensure no one would hear.  
But that didn't stop Draco from giving her a pointed look. He pulled back from the table to stand up at his full height, trying to tell her to back off silently. Draco didn't need this. He didn't to be put in the patient's chair in his ward and be prodded in front of everyone.

He knew what separation anxiety was. He had learned about it in his training and had seen extreme cases come in and out these words and old wives tales at Astoria's baby showers. But that was that. It was the anxiety of a baby not being around their mother or a mother not being around her baby. But Draco was a father. He is a father that chose to work to ensure a better livelihood for his son in the future. Who was Susan Bones to try to diagnose him in the middle of the working day?

Ms. Bones seemed to have understood the look but didn't back down, though she had moved her hand away from him. "Look, I'm serious. You took a month off to be with your baby. Coming back to work isn't going to be easy," she said in the most sincere way possible. But her words didn't sit right with Draco. He felt too exposed. Too out in the open. Draco looked around the hall, and the idle chitchat seemed to muddle into one, increasing in volume. The words were turning to noise, ringing in his ears. And their eyes. Everyone's eyes were all set on him. Everyone was watching, staring. Judging.

Ms. Bones reached out and guided him into the staff room in haste, and once the door shut behind them, Draco could finally breathe, the buzzing coming to a halt. He kept his back to her, and he dragged his fingers through his hair and took another deep breath. His heart was pounding in his chest, and Draco had to focus on the walls around them to calm down. Exhale 1...2...3, inhale 1...2...3.

It took a couple of minutes for Draco to compose himself before sitting on the couch behind him. He heard a faint "I'm sorry," escape Ms. Bones as he folded his hands together in front of him and rested his elbows on his knees. "Well, I suppose you're going to send me home with a stronger potion, isn't that right?" he snared, finding it difficult to look at her. He hated how calm she was as she sat in front of him, watching him break apart. She would probably love to spend this former death-eater home and start working on a case against him to revoke his license. Everyone would just love that.

"I'm not going to do that. Mainly because you're already on the highest dose of your anxiety," Ms. Bones said bluntly, causing Draco to let out a huff of bitter laughter. "But I want you to remember to take care of yourself. Yes, having a new baby and a recovering wife tends to push your health out of your mind. But you need to realize that you're a Healer if you're not in the right mindset, you're not going to be allowed to treat patients. And we wouldn't want that after how much you fought for this. You need to keep yourself in check and know when to step away."

Draco rubbed his hand over his mouth and nodded as he listened. He knew she was right. He knew he had been distracted all day by his anxious thoughts. He had been careless with his patients and had to go back to them several times to double check facts and results. It wasn't like him at all. "So, what do you suppose I do?" Draco looked up at her expectantly.

"Well, acceptance will be the most important thing," she started. "Then, with any thoughts that come to your mind, I want to acknowledge them and then push them aside. You need to remind yourself that everything will be okay and you have enough house elves to take care of both Astoria and Scorpius. But for the long term, we will need to pick back up again. Three times a week? I can do house visits on your free days, and you can just come by the ward during your breaks when you're working," she offered, glancing at the time. Draco knew that taking the attending Healer away even for five minutes could cause quite a stir against her.

"I'll try my best to do that," he responded, his voice tired, but not unwilling to give it a go. After years of being her patient, Draco knew that she was smart enough to figure out what worked best for him.

Draco sighed heavily and pushed himself off the couch, brushing his hands against his cloak to straighten it out. "I'll inform you when I'm free, and we can start next week," he said, slipping his hands into his pocket.

Ms. Bones nodded and got up as well. She followed Draco to the door and stepped out. "Sounds good to me. and Draco," she said and patted his shoulder. "It's okay to have feelings. You're not the only one going through this." And with that she headed out of the ward, whistling away. Draco watched her go with his mouth set in a hard line. He knew she was right. But it was easier said than done. His son was small and fragile that anything could happen.

No. Draco had trained elves that had been around when he was a baby, so they knew what was doing. Scorpius was going to be okay. And when he gets home, nothing would have changed.

Draco took in a deep breath, clearing his mind as he grabbed the next file from the front desk and headed back to work. His thoughts were coming and going, but Draco managed to sweep them aside by reminding himself that when he goes home, everything will be just as he left it and his family will be as perfect as ever. As for patient in bed two, well, this was going to be interesting.

It was 9:03 on the dot, when the Malfoy fireplace erupted in blazing green flames and Draco, stepped out. He unclipped his cloak and dropped it to the side, only vaguely aware of the elf's magic to straighten it up.

"Master Draco, Sir. Your family awaits you in Lady Astoria's private parlour. Would Master have his dinner in the parlour tonight," the house elf- Honey squeaked as she hurried to keep up with his long strides.

"I already had my dinner, thank you, Honey. That will be all," he hummed as he made his way past the library and towards a large, mahogany door, hearing laughter from inside as he turned the knob and pushed it open, the sight warming his heart.

Inside sat Astoria with her legs stretched along her Chesterfield with a blanket draped over them as Daphne sat on the lounge chair across from her with Scorpius on her lap, giggling as he tugged away at his Auntie's hair.

The two women looked up, and Astoria smiled brightly. "Oh, Draco. You're finally back. Sorry, we didn't hear the floo," she said, giving in an apologetic grin.

Draco shook his head fondly and stepped inside. "No matter, I just arrived moments ago," he said and turned his attention to the other Lady in the room. "Daphne. Good to see you. My, I say, being brunette is very becoming on you."

"Ah, Draco. As charming as ever," Daphne said through her grin and bundled Scorpius back in her arms before carefully getting up and walking her way over to him and give him a hug and a kiss on each cheek.

Draco copied the gesture as his mind was occupied with assessing his baby. Scorpius was cooing contently with no apparent changes. The sight was a great relief for him. The day had been successful.

He carefully took Scorpius in his arms and kissed his head and pressed the cold tip of his nose against his cheek, a smile forming on his lips as Scorpius let out a huff and swatted him away.

Draco only looked back up when he heard Daphne chuckle and furrowed his eyebrows at her. "You look quite handsome with a baby," she said with a glint of mischieve in her eyes.  
Draco shot her a dull expression before turning to look at Scorpius once more. "So, I see France is treating you well," he started as he walked over to the sofas and sat himself down by Astoria's feet, gently bouncing Scorpius slightly and reaching his hand over to give Scorpius his fingers to grab. He smiled as Scorpius clung to him and waved his hand around. Draco had missed this so much. How did he survive being away from him?

Daphne sat back down where she was before and cleared her throat, making Draco look back up and glare at her playful expression. "Yes, quite. The weather is lovely. I was just telling Astoria how you three ought to come down for a visit. It would be quite good for Scorpius to get some sun, non?"

Draco glanced at his wife and noticed the girlish excitement on her face. Draco never did understand how the relationship between the sisters worked, but whatever Daphne said, Astoria always acted liked it was the most brilliant plan she's ever heard. However, if there were a holiday destination he would want to take Scorpius to, it would be Paris. That way he could show Scorpius the Effiel tower from the comfort and safety of Daphne's flat.

"I suppose so. But Scorpius will have to be a couple of months to be suitable for travel, at least," he said, watching as the sisters squealed in delight, already ready to plan.

Draco smiled fondly at them. Despite the fact that his view on life is different from Daphne, he hoped this was the kind of atmosphere their home always had, even when she was not visiting. It would be good for Scorpius to grow up in a home where childlike imagination was celebrated, and the future was exciting to look forward to and not a dark hole of uncertainty.  
Scorpius scoffed and wiggled around in his blanket and Draco turned his attention back to him, a breath of laughter escaping his lips. "It's alright, my boy. All my attention is back on you," he said and could have sworn Scorpius smiled.

Draco cleared his throat and stood up. "Well, I'm going to get him to bed. I'll be back," he said and rested Scorpius against his chest as he got up and stepped towards his wife, kissing her on her temple. "How are you feeling," he whispered in her hair.  
Astoria turned her attention to him and smiled softly. "Much better, my dear."

Draco returned the smile and nodded. "Good, because your specialist appointment is on Thursday," he said, not waiting for her to reply or reject before turning around and reached out to Daphne's extended hand and giving it a slight squeeze, a silent gesture of goodbye.

"Don't hurry back," Daphne teased, and for once, Draco was going to listen to her.

As they reached the nursery, Draco stepped in and took in a deep breath and let out a heavy sigh as he saw the starlit ceiling twinkling above them. As Draco lifted his wand from his pocket, he lit the candles and the night of the room turned to day. "Much better," he said softly to his baby and closed the door behind him as he made his way across the room to the changing table.

Draco watched as Scorpius looked around and cooed curiously at the tweeting of birds the room emitted. With his elbows rested against the surface, he let himself lean over his baby, and all his masks came undone. He no longer was a Healer. Nor was he Draco Malfoy. With his baby, he allowed himself to be just Draco.  
He smiled wide as his baby stared at him, letting out happy noises and reached out to his face. Draco leaned in and allowed his tiny hands slap against his cheeks and even as Scorpius started to grab, Draco could help but let out a soft laugh. "My boy, what are you doing?"

Scorpius cooed and wiggled his legs, kicking away the blanket, now only covered in his yellow onesie. The one that Narissa had gifted Scorpius a few days back. And it looked delightful on his son alongside his golden hair and pink cheeks.

Draco held onto Scorpius' legs and kissed his covered feet, watching his baby giggled and continued to squirm around. Draco felt that the pains of the day no longer mattered, that his thoughts had just been the ghosts of the past taking on new faces. How could Scorpius be in harm's way in the safety of his home? A home he had spent far too long ensure that no speck of dark magic remained.

Draco spent the next couple minutes replacing Scorpius' nappy and changing him into his night clothes, opting for a baby blue onesie with covered hands and feet. It was exceptionally adorable, especially as he walked Scorpius murmured curiously at the clothed hands.

"Alright, my sweet boy. Let's get you to sleep," he said and lifted him up from under his arms. He held him up for a moment, taking in how his baby looked down at him with the cutest grin. Draco then rested him against his chest while making his way to the armchair. As he sat down, he held his wand up and made the room go from the day back to nighttime. Pointing the wand to the side, he lit the flame from the oil lamp that rested on the small table right beside his chair.

Draco set his wand down and leaned against the backrest with Scorpius' sprawled on his chest, his little cheek resting against his left shoulder, cooing softly with each breath as Draco splayed his hand over his back, patting slowly. It was a mesmerizing sight for Draco. He watched as the dim light of the flame flickered to dance it's radiance upon his son's features as Scorpius watched it in return. The gentleness of the movements and the constant rhythm of his hand calming him down.

"I missed you today, Scorpius," Draco whispered, to his son. "I felt terribly lonely without and your mother. I bit hopeless on my part, really," he said and bit back a grin as Scorpius grumbled as though commenting along. "I hope I can get over it soon. I don't want this to stunt your growth nor my work," he continued, feeling a bit ridiculous as he spoke. The words felt foreign in his mouth, too unusual.

Draco brought his other hand up to gently rub his thumb against Scorpius' cheek as he leaned down to press a kiss on his head. It was only moments later when Draco drew his hand away when he saw Scorpius' eyes were shut and his breathing even. "Merlin, you are the most precious thing," he whispered before leaning his head back and stared at the constellations above.

His baby was safe, and his wife was going to see a specialist. He had done his job for the day. There was no need to worry. There was no need to to take the weight of his family on his shoulders as intensely as he had done before. That was the past.

Parenthood was a new trial. A better one, one that promised good memories and a lifetime of happiness. This separation-anxiety was just his first hurdle. But it still felt like a burden on his brain even when he should be unwinding at this moment. He could keep speaking, but speech was never his strongest suit. Draco preferred writing, and a particular form came to mind. One he knew always seemed to ease him from his worries.

Draco kissed Scorpius' head once more before lifting his wand and with a silent incantation, rotated his wrist. The door creaked open and flying in was his inkpot, quill and a roll of parchment that settled themselves on the table beside Draco's chair.

Draco carefully sat himself up slightly with his hand firmly on Scorpius' back while his right hand placed the wand down and picked up the quill. He dipped the tip into the ink, and with the flickering of the flame and with Scorpius' gentle breath upon his shoulder, he wrote.

 

_Dear Scorpius..._

 


	3. First words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Astoria is convinced Scorpius' first words will be 'dada' while Draco is adamant it will be 'mama'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be the last chapter of 2017, I will post again in the New Year. Thank you all for following along with this story and for your support. Comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year!
> 
> Note: Slight Drastoria nsfw (just barely and besides, they're married, what do you expect?)

_Dear Scorpius,_  
_Your first word was so important for your mother and I. For it did not only hold the weight of your intelligence, but it reminded us that your love is no competition. That as parents we are equals in your life and regardless whom you'll love more, we will both love you with our entire being, for you are our son and deserve nothing but the happiest life._

 

  
Draco held Scorpius against his chest as he sat cross-legged in the nursery, cooing and making sounds for Scorpius to follow along. For the last couple days, Scorpius has had a fascination with 'oo' sounds, and Draco was more than willing to help with his curiosity

Scorpius pursed his lips just like his father and started to copy his noises. Scorpius then burst into a fit of giggles and Draco couldn't help but hug him tight and kiss his chubby cheeks. "Very good. Well done, Scorpius."

Astoria, who stood at the other end of the room began to laugh, having to pull away from the window to place her hand on her side. "Oh, I have a family of monkeys," she said and wrapped her arms around her waist and bent over laughing, her eyes teary and her face red.

Draco furrowed his eyebrows at her and huffed, turning away to face their son again. "Oh, hush. You won't be laughing when he will be reciting sonnets and speaking six languages," he defended. He had to admit it felt a bit silly to be making all these noises to Scorpius, but he was at the age where this was so important for his growth. And Draco didn't want his son to be anything but the best. Plus, it was utterly adorable seeing how happy Scorpius got when playing with him.

"Ah, yes. Because he'll be a true scholar because he knows his oo's and ah's," Astoria teased before lifting her wand and continuing to adjust the flowers on the windowsill.

Draco rolled his eyes and pinched Scorpius cheek playfully. "Don't worry, my sweet boy, we'll prove mummy wrong," he said and grinned as Scorpius giggled and clapped his hands. "See, Astoria. He believes he can do it too,"

Draco looked up at his wife and noticed the way she watched them with a silly grin. "You two are going to be trouble. Ganging up on me like that," she hummed and started to add more baby's breath to the arrangement in front of her.

"Oh, I doubt that. Knowing Scorpius, he will be a mummy's boy," he said and reached over to brush Scorpius' hair from his face, noticing how much paler it had gotten from being bleached in the French sun all summer. He should've made sure Scorpius wore a hat more often. At least his boy didn't get burnt. Draco wouldn't be able to bare his son to be in pain, or any form of discomfort at that.

Astoria paused her movements and fondly shook her head. "No way. Just look at him. He clings to you from the moment he wakes to when he sleeps. He's a daddy's boy, through and through," she said and gestured to their son. "Just look at him," she said before her grin softened and turned to face them.

Draco looked down at Scorpius and watched as he comfortably sat in his lap while shaking around one of his rattles. When it started to sparkle, Scorpius cooed and looked up at Draco, handing it to him.

"Thank you, Scorpius," Draco hummed and kissed the top of his head before taking the rattle and shaking it in front of his face.

The two watched as Scorpius' face lit up and he bounced excitedly. "Wa!" Scorpius mimicked the sound of the rattle and Draco couldn't help but laugh. He felt Scorpius took more and more space in his heart- space he didn't even know he had with each passing day.

Astoria settled herself on the floor in front of them and started to hold up Scorpius' favourite plush dragon and started to make it jump around, much to Scorpius' delight.

Draco saw his wife and sighed softly. She looked so tired behind her glowing tan and happiness in her eyes. He knew she was trying to ignore the pain that she had been dealing with since Scorpius was born. Draco wished she would at least admit there was a problem. But he wouldn't push it. It wouldn't be fair to her. Not when it had been months of tests and running around to try to figure out what was wrong with her. Not even the specialists at St. Mungo's and doctors in France seemed to be stumped.

"I think he's going to say 'dada' first if I'm honest." Astoria's voice broke Draco's train of thought and looked back down at his son, who was now nibbling on the dragon's tail.  
Draco's lips curled into a soft smile and shook his head. "He'll say mother for sure."

Astoria looked up at him, and he looked up, noticing her deadpan expression. "I will be very concerned if my baby says 'mother' as his first word," she said, unable to stop herself from smirking.

Draco blinked at her, taking a moment to process what she said before bursting out laughing. He turned his head away and covered his mouth, and they all laughed. Even Scorpius who seemed just to be pleased that his parents were making such a ruckus.

  
The Malfoys sat around the small round table in the garden with Scorpius in his highchair, nibbling away at some peas while the two adults enjoyed a perfect Provençal Stuffed Squid.

Draco watched as Astoria take a bite before melting into her seat, letting her eyes close for a moment as she hummed in delight "Tell the kitchen that they did an excellent job, Honey. It tastes just like the one we had in Paris," Astoria said and watched as the house elf Honey hurry off to do so.

Draco bit back a smile as he took a sip of his wine. "We've only been back for three days. I'm starting to wonder if you enjoy France more than England, my dear," he teased and took another bite.

Astoria glanced at him and shrugged. "It was a nice holiday, and it's nice to spend time with Daphne. She and Scorpius bonded so well. And you got to relax. So yes, as of right now, I do prefer France," she defended before turning to Scorpius who was babbling incoherently.

Draco watched the two over the rim of his glass. Scorpius' eyes caught the candlelight and sparkled with the same charm of his wife's. And the way they both crinkled their noses when they smiled, well, Draco could not put into words how brilliant his two favourite people were and how amazed at how similar they were too.

"Such a mummy's boy," Draco said softly before taking a sip. He knew it was silly, but as far as he could remember, every boy he knew loved their fathers more than their mothers. Though, it was to be expected if those fathers were as cold and standoffish as his own was. Draco was just glad that old age and the fear of going to Azkaban has softened his edges.

"Nope," she said simply and grabbed a napkin to wipe off some smushed peas off Scorpius' cheek. "He will say 'dada' first if it's the last thing I do."

Draco saw the crafty look on her face and set his glass down, taking in a breath before composing his face from smiling. "Is that a challenge," he asked, trying to sound uninterested as he took another bite of his dinner.

Astoria watched him before sipping her wine, hiding her smirk. "I do believe it is. Unless you'd like to admit that I am right and he'll say dada first."

"Not a chance," Draco said quickly and sat up. "So, what's the reward for the winner? The loser has to be on night duty for a week," he proposed, his recent fatherhood stunting his creativity to be more child-friendly. But by the way, Astoria smirked, he knew she had other plans.

"Don't be such a bore, Draco," she hummed and chuckled as Draco stiffened as she brushed the heel against his ankle. "Do you remember that shop we went to," she started, eying her husband who tried so hard to keep himself composed. Though, Draco did not like where this was going.

"Yes, I might recall that shop," he said, focusing on sipping the contents of his glass trying not to blush because Malfoys do not get flustered.

"Well, why doesn't the loser wear what we bought for a night," she hummed and traced her foot up his leg, her wicked grin only getting bigger.

Draco choked on his wine and quickly set the glass down, leaning to the side as he coughed into his napkin. "Darling, you can't possibly be serious," he asked, his eyes flicking to their son who was now laughing at him.

"Oh, relax. I'm avoiding any big-people words. And what's there to lose if you're so certain you're going to win," Astoria said and leaned back, reaching out to her son to playfully pinch his cheek.

Draco cleared his throat and regained his composure. Well, after having the baby, they did find it hard to find time for each other. Even in France. So, what did he have to lose."

"It's a deal," he said and raised his glass to her. Astoria perked up back to her playful demeanour and lifted her glass and them too tapped them together. Draco took a sip before facing his attention to Scorpius. "Son, you and I have a lot of work to do," he ordered much to Scorpius' amusement.

  
Draco tapped his wand on his table, staring up at the clock. He still had an hour to go before he could leave work. It was Tuesday evening, and the flow of patients was slow, and the paperwork felt tedious. Despite having no stimulation, his mind didn't wander his anxious thoughts any more thanks to returning to therapy. Of course, there were times they would hit him with the force of ten stunning spells, but after the trip to France, they seemed to have fizzled out.

Today, however, he was more impatient than ever because two floors up to his wife, mother and baby were all visiting. Every month the three of them would stop by for Scorpius' routine check, and today, currently, Astoria was getting yet another test done. Though the fact that they were under the same roof made his heart ache for his baby and wife.

It had been a couple of days since they agreed on this bet and each day was full of excitement- well, as exciting as two new parents would find it. Scorpius has been babbling and making noises nonstop, causing both him and Astoria to jump at anything that remotely sounded like 'Ma' or 'Da.' Though, at least they agreed that Scorpius had to be calling to one of them for it to count really.

Draco chuckled softly to himself as he traced his quill against a scrap piece of paper, drawing circles as his mind wondered. He often caught himself imagining an infinite amount of scenarios for Scorpius' future. He could become a Healer just like him. Draco was sure he would be perfect for the job. Scorpius would be intelligent and kind and compassionate. Or he could be a music enthusiast like his mother, playing concerts around the world. And even if Scorpius wanted to be a musician like the Weird Sisters, Draco would support him without batting an eye. All he wanted was for his son to be happy.

Draco looked up from his desk when he heard a knock on the door and hurried to shuffle his parchments into a proper pile. "Come in," he called out.

The door cracked open, and Narcissa stepped inside with a cooing Scorpius in her arms. "Sorry to intrude," she said and stepped inside, closing the door behind her.

"Not at all, mother. I was doing nothing important," he said and got up from his seat and shrugged off his Healer's cloak. He made his way across the room and kissed her cheek before reaching out to take Scorpius in his arms, smiling brightly at his son as Scorpius patted his cheeks and giggled.

Narcissa placed her hand on his arm and smiled at the two before making her way to sit down in one of the seats in front of Draco's desk. "How is work, Draco? Seems a bit quiet today."

Draco followed his mother and sat down beside her, placing Scorpius on his lap. "Yes, it has been. Though, I am not complaining," he said and leaned down to kiss Scorpius' cheek and bounce him slightly. He held his sides to steady him as he focused on his mother again. "How was his checkup?"

Narcissa smiled and pointed her wand to the kettle on the counter and started to prepare two cups of tea. "Everything is exactly as it should be. Ms. Patil is quite pleased with his progress," she hummed and allowed the two cups float over and settle on Draco's desk beside them.

Draco watched his mother as she so elegantly displayed her presence in the room. Even Astoria has admitted that no other lady could walk in a place and stop time for a moment for everyone to appreciate her. Even after the war, she never faltered. Sure, there was a period when she, along with everyone else on trial secluded themselves, but even then, she held her head up high and fought for her family with a chilling calmness that made no one second guess her standing. Draco owed this life that he had to her. If she hadn't lied to Lord Voldemort, the outcome of the war would have been the opposite. She was Draco's hero and every day he is his grateful that she is his mother.

Draco chuckled under his breath looked down to brush his hand over Scorpius' hair. He was such a mummy's boy. Just like every Malfoy before him and after.

"Where's Astoria? Still at her appointment," Draco looked back up at his mother who was giving him that typical motherly look before turning away to sip her tea.

"Yes, she's still with the specialist. They're testing her blood," Narcissa sighed and shook her head. "I honestly find it troubling how no Healer has managed to diagnose her. Even the specialists seem so incompetent," she continued.

Draco hummed and nodded, but he stayed quiet. He knew the reason she was upset was that she could see how it was affecting both of them. She had expressed before how Scorpius will have an improper childhood if he grows up with an ill mother. Draco knew this. He has seen children of sick parents and parents who weren't around for various reasons. And Draco knew one thing for sure; he never wanted that for Scorpius.

"At least you are an excellent father, Draco. You surprise me every day how much of the work you are taking on," Narcissa finally added, reaching over to place her tender hand on his.

"Oh, don't be like that. I am just doing what any father would do," Draco insisted, lacing his fingers with his dear mother and smiling at the reassuring squeeze.

"You are going above and beyond, Draco. Even your father wouldn't have been able to handle how much you're doing. And he was one of the better fathers I have seen." Narcissa sighed, and the two sat in silence as Scorpius busied himself with nibbling his fist, his eyes curiously watching the two adults.

Draco knew she was right, that he was taking on more responsibility than the average man. How could he not though? He didn't want to risk anything with Scorpius' upbringing. Along with Astoria's weakness, he had to step up. But Draco didn't see it as a burden. It was the opposite. He loved his son and wanted to spend every waking moment with him and be there when he speaks his first words and takes his first steps. He wants to be the one to teach him how to fly a broom and read books. He liked to imagine a little Scorpius helping him in with his potions and wandering the halls with his Healer's cloak on. Draco wanted Scorpius to have a good childhood and one where he was there for him every step of the way.

"Did Astoria tell you about our little competition," Draco said, deciding to change the topic. He didn't want to be trapped in his thoughts while his mother was present. He didn't want to be trapped in his thoughts, period.

Narcissa smiled softly and drew her hand back, sitting comfortably in her seat as she nodded. "She did, indeed," she said and took a sip of her tea.

"And? Are you on my side, mother," Draco asked, flicking his gaze up before frowning when she didn't look back but instead smiling against her cup.

Narcissa let the question linger before placing her cup down. "Actually..." she trailed off and finally looked back at him, her lips trying hard not to smile too hard. "I entirely agree with her. I think Scorpius will say dad first."

"Oh mother, no," Draco whined playfully and sat up. Scorpius even decided to join him but letting out a disgruntled huff and leaned against his father's chest. "See, he agrees too."

Narcissa laughed softly and shook her head. "That gives me all the more reason to believe Astoria. Just look at him, Draco. He looks at you like you are the sun. It's cute, and you should be proud of it."

Draco pressed his lips together and just shrugged. "Don't you think that's a tad dramatic, mother," he asked. Draco wrapped his arms around Scorpius leaned down to kiss his head. "I don't deny that he loves me. But, I mean," Draco stopped to try to construct his words to convey what he was trying to say properly. "A mother should always be the first in a child's eyes. Astoria carried him for nine months, after all. I would hate to take that from her." Draco was serious about what he said. No matter what, he did not want to push Astoria into the shadows because he insists she is sick. Draco didn't want to do that to his wife. They got married to be equals in all aspects of life, not for each of them to try to do everything. They were a team and this constant reminder that Scorpius seemed to love him more made it more evident to him that he was not following his vows.

"Draco," Narcissa said softly and got up from her seat and stood beside Draco, placing her arms on her head and bringing him to rest against her middle.

Draco closed his eyes and let himself relax in the familiar position. He no longer felt twenty-six years old, but a child being comforted after a bad dream. Draco had no idea not much he needed this, not until he was being hugged. His mind coming to a halt from the buzzing he wasn't even aware was happening. He felt, as though for the first time in a long time that he didn't have to take the weight of the world off his shoulders, that he was stupid not to remember it was to be shared. Shared with his mother and his father and his wife. Scorpius' upbringing was not only his concern, and the simple comfort of his mother reminded him of that without uttering a single word. Still, it made him worry if he would be capable of providing the same level of security for Scorpius. He hoped Astoria's illness would become one of the past and they both could bear the load.

The two stayed like that for a while; the gentle brushing Narcissa did with Draco's hair was mimicked by Draco on Scorpius' back. It wasn't until Scorpius started getting fussy did they pull apart. "Sorry, my boy," Draco said softly and turned him around to face him and kissed his head before turning to his mother. He took his hand and squeezed it. "Thank you, mother."

"Don't thank me, Draco. You still need to talk to Astoria about this. I can tell you that she has a different view on all this," she said and placed her hand on his shoulder and turned around to look at the cloak, smiling. "Oh good, you're done for the day. Why don't we get Astoria and head home? What do you say about that plan, Scorpius," she said and leaned down to pick up her grandson, peppering his cheek with kisses.

Draco smiled at the pair before finally getting up, kissing her cheek before kissing Scorpius' head. "Yes, lets,"

  
Draco and Astoria sat in bed that night with Scorpius curled up against her side with Astoria's arm securely around him. They sat in silence for a while, Draco sitting with his back to Astoria, having finished explaining what he had been feeling for the last couple days. Draco had his head hung low, staring at his feet. No matter how much they talked about feelings and such, Draco never really felt right about it. It always made him feel small and exposed. And despite being only in the company of his wife, those feelings still lingered.

He heard Astoria shift around until he felt her cheek against his back. "You know I don't think like that, right? I don't mind if you and Scorpius love you more. I'm happy, actually. It just proves that you can handle things when the going gets tough," she whispered and placed her hand on his shoulder.

Draco looked back and noticed the look on her face. She was tired, but the light didn't leave her eyes. In fact, Draco could swear they were brighter, determined to get her point across.

"Astoria," Draco said softly and shifted around to sit his back against the backboard, gathering Astoria and pulling her against his chest, the two carefully placing Scorpius between them. "I'm your husband. I have to be a part of our child's life. And this time will pass, and we will get back on track with our plan," he said and traced his hand up and down her arm, placing his lips on her forehead.

Astoria had her gaze down, watching Scorpius suck on his binky, looking up at both his parents with his adorably large eyes. Draco observed how she carefully reached out and brushed her thumb against his rosy cheek. "I just want to know what's wrong with me," she whispered. It was the first time she admitted that there was a problem and Draco sighed softly, glad that she was taking the first step- acceptance.

"We will, my dear. We will, and we will do whatever it takes to make you feel like yourself again, and this will all be forgotten," Draco said softly.

Astoria nodded and bit her lip, shutting her eyes tight to hold back from spilling tears. "I hope so. I don't want Scorpius to blame himself for this," she said, continuing to whisper.

Looking down at his wife, he could feel her shake in his arms. He could see how much the pain had affected her emotionally and it stung. He knew she would boil over and he had tried to prepare for that moment. And now that the moment had come, Draco felt caught off guard, but luckily not unprepared.

Draco just wrapped his arms around her and held Astoria close to his chest. "That will never happen, Astoria. We will never let that happen, you hear? No matter what, Scorpius will know nothing but love and happiness," he said and rubbed her back as she buried her head against his shoulder and felt her tears stain his shirt.

"Mama?"

Draco and Astoria both froze and Draco looked up to see Scorpius sitting up with a pout on his face. Astoria had shifted around to look at Scorpius with the same bewildered look.

"Mama," Scorpius cooed again and crawled over and placed his little hands on her cheeks.

Astoria blinked at her son before her face broke out into a wide grin. "Draco, he- he said mama," she said and took Scorpius' hands and kissed his palms, laughing softly through the last of her tears. "Oh, my baby, what timing you have," she said and drew him close to her chest and kissed her temple.

Needless to say, Draco was stunned. His son. His boy had said his first words to comfort his mother. He didn't just say his first word like every other baby who was just following along with his parents but on his own accord. Merlin, he was the best baby. So kind and compassionate. It was nothing like Draco had ever seen. His Scorpius was so bright at this age and so loving that it amazed Draco how such a wonderful child could be half of him.

Draco laughed and wrapped his arms around the two and placed a kiss on Scorpius' face when his baby perked up. "You, my son are so smart. The smartest. You're going to be the smartest person in the entire world," he said and kissed his nose, grinning brightly at the way Scorpius scrunched his button nose up.

"Don't be dramatic," Astoria teased, playfully hitting his chest before smiling at Scorpius, the two captivated by their son. "He will be the smartest person in history," she added, causing Draco to laugh softly.

Scorpius yawned and laid down on Draco's chest, curled up against Astoria, cooing softly. Somehow, finally saying his first words tiring him out and now he was ready to fall asleep.

Astoria continued to brush her fingers against his cheek as Draco wrapped his arm around him as Scorpius' eyes started to droop.

Once the room fell quiet, and they were sure Scorpius was asleep, Astoria rested her head against Draco's, sighing in relief. The pain of just moments ago having just vanished as though they never existed. The two stayed that way for a while until Astoria looked up at Draco and Draco looked back at Astoria, a sheepish grin on her face while Draco could not help but smirk as he whispered:  
"Look like I won the bet."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	4. Illness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco and Astoria finally learn what illness she has and a possible treatment that may save their small family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year everyone. Sorry this took me so long to write. I just had really bad writer's block since the break. A few notes before you start:
> 
> \- It's quite Drastoria heavy. But I felt this was important to write so I did it anyway
> 
> \- It's shorter than the other chapters but I do plan on updating the next chapter quite soon (I'm already midway through it)
> 
> \- Also, this is pretty angsty and yet again, the next chapter will be a happy one and certainly back to being centered around Scorpius 
> 
> Enjoy x

Draco leaned back in his seat. His finger tapping anxiously at the table. His other hand dragged over his mouth in frustration. His knee jittered. His eyes fixated on the parchment in front of him. He felt uneasy, queasy almost. He sat there, staring at the parchment with bolded words that changed everything he knew about the future.

Blood Malediction.

He flicked his gaze up and watched the two Healers sitting across from him fidget uncomfortably in their seats as they waited for him to break the silence. They waited for him to say something. Anything about the results in front of him. But how could he? What could he even say?

Draco slid his fingers across the table and held the paper, thumbing the corner as his eyes skimmed the ink once more, but not reading a single word. He had read it four times now, and it was finally starting to set in. And as it did, Draco's muted shock turned to frustration.

"This can't be right," Draco almost scowled. He tossed the parchment to the middle of the table and watched the Healers jump at the outburst before quickly recollecting themselves.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Malfoy. But it is true. From all her tests, this is our only conclusion," one of them said, her voice getting timider by the word before lowering her head apologetically.

Draco stared at her before letting out a heavy sigh and leaned back. His face morphed from anger to a strange mix of concern, hopelessness and a sick sense of relief. At least now they knew what was going on.

He ran his hand over his face once again before sitting up again and trying to bring back his common neutral expression. "Well, what do we do now? There's no treatment for this," Draco said, finding it harder than ever to keep his voice calm.

"We know," the bearded one replied, his eyes watching Mr. Malfoy. "But we can keep her comfortable, as you know. And experimental Muggle treatments coul-"

"I'm sorry, what?" Draco had cut him off. "Muggle treatments? Are you serious," Draco has sat up straight in his seat and glared down at him. He had learned about some Muggle treatments being integrated into St. Mungo's, but Draco and his colleagues have seen them make no improvements and in some cases worsen their patients. "I am not putting my wife through any of their unnecessarily complicated contraptions."

The Healer waited a moment for Draco to pause before continuing. "We understand, Mr. Malfoy. But, with this particular disease, we have no other option. Muggles have something very similar to this from our research. And they have treatment for it. A very effective one too,"

Draco folded his hands in his lap and watched him continue to describe the treatment. Chemotherapy. It didn't sound too foreign, but he knew Astoria wouldn't like it. But, if it had any chance of making her better, it would have to do. They had to at least give it a try.

"Alright. I'll talk to here," Draco sighed and pushed himself out of his seat. The others followed and nodded.

"We'll start her file and prepare the consent forms. By Friday" the female Healer said.

Draco nodded his head towards them and tried to give a polite smile, but his muscles would not let him. So, he stayed stoic. "Right. I'll see you both then."

The two mumbled their goodbyes before walking out of Draco's office, leaving him alone in his thoughts.

Draco kept standing there, his hands in his trouser pockets as his he watched the snow fall out the window. It was mid-January now and how the Holidays had passed so quickly. Draco wished for a moment he could just relive them again. Just for a minute.

He remembered how Narcissa danced with Scorpius in her arms while Astoria kept arranging and rearranging the decorations on the tree. Lucius and Daphne sitting close by chatting away about international affairs. How Scorpius soon started to until Narcissa wrapped him up in her dreadfully fluffy cloak which Scorpius played for hours in as it was the perfect in-between of snow and warmth.

A breath of laughter escaped him as a small smile curled on his lips. His family had truly enjoyed themselves without a care of the world. How Draco wished to go back to when this news had not yet reached him. When he could pretend everything was perfect. When he could forget about his PTSD and his parent's adamant views on blood-purity and racism. Daphne's alcoholism. Astoria's illness. Scorpius' uncertain future.

Scorpius. Draco felt a muttered curse leave his mouth. This would affect his son the most. To loose his mother so young. It wasn't fair. It was cruel. Scorpius didn't deserve that. He was so pure and innocent and this would break him.

The clock above his desk started to chime, and Draco forced himself out of this thoughts and turned around. One o'clock. His shift was over. Draco closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts. Though, happy thoughts couldn't seem to overpower this. They could get through this. Astoria would make the right decision for their son. She always did and Draco just had to hold onto that as a beacon of hope that this too shall pass and become nothing more than a harmless memory.

Draco slipped off his white clock, hanging it on the hook in exchange for his winter one. He looked around the office once more, making sure nothing important was forgotten before making his way out and towards the fireplaces to take the floo home to his child and possibly dying wife.

 

The day had gone in a blur. He remembered seeing his wife playing piano with Scorpius on her lap. He remembered Scorpius trying to crawl all over him as he was trying to finish some reports. He remembered Astoria telling him some story at dinner while he fed Scorpius something. He remembered Scorpius babbling against his chest as Astoria read him a bedtime story. But the details, the substance of the day had left his mind. It was so similar to those days he had after the war where he was present, but his mind had departed this plane of existence.

He kept staring at his wife and wondering what life would be like if she weren't there. How Scorpius would cry for his mother and Draco could do nothing about it. The thought ached his chest, and he found himself holding Scorpius tighter, pressing his nose against his golden hair and taking a moment to just ground himself. He needed to be there for Scorpius. He had to stay strong.

When Draco calmed down, Astoria was watching him. The book closed in her hand, and her arms loosely crossed as she leaned against the crib. He knew the expression she wore she wanted to talk. For this, he was grateful, for Draco didn't know if he could bring it up on his own.

Draco rose from his seat and walked over to the crib and kissed Scorpius' head, holding him for a moment to watch Astoria lean down to copy the gesture, her peach lipstick leaving a subtle stain on his temple. Something that neither one rubbed off. He placed Scorpius down in the crib and watched his chest rise and fall until he felt Astoria take his hand and tug it, guiding him away.

Draco took in a deep breath through his nose and exhaled as he turned around, silently following his wife out of the room and back to their own. His mind occupied with how he should word his knowledge; which was impossibly hard when it was your wife instead of a stranger.

As he stepped into the bedroom, he walked over to the end of the bed, his arms crossed as his shoulder leaned against the grand bedpost, watching her.

Astoria shut the door behind her and turned to face him, raising a single eyebrow at him. "What is wrong with you today, Draco? Why are you acting so docile?"

Draco wanted to shrug, and he was about to. But he was not a teenager which a confusing surge of hormones muddling his brain. He was a man and knew very well what was bothering him. "Your results came in today," he said, his voice clear but weak. At least he had found it in him to say it.

Astoria stared at him with a blank expression before she subtly licked her bottom lip and pressed them into a thin line. Her arms crossed again, and she shrugged, starting to make her way to her vanity. "Okay."

Okay? That's it? Draco furrowed his eyebrows together and stood up straight, taking a step forward until he saw himself in the mirror behind her. "Okay? Don't you want to know what it said?"

Astoria looked at him in the mirror as she removed one of her earrings. "No. That's why I told them they could just tell you," she said nonchalantly, placing her jewelry back in their box.

Draco felt a surge of anger sweep through him. How could she be so selfish? How dare she act as though this pain she carries around doesn't deserve an answer nor treatment. "Why not? You cannot just pretend it doesn't exist," he scolded, his voice rising to a yell.

Astoria turned to him, frowning and her anger written all over her face. "I don't want to know, Draco! I don't care as long as it doesn't kill me!"

"But it might!"

Draco watched as his shout shook her. Her eyes widened, and her jaw hung. Her body frozen in shock.

The silence swept over the room with unnerving speed; so silent that Draco could have sworn he could hear Scorpius' breathing as though he was beside him.

He pressed his lips together, and he slipped his hands into his trouser pockets, waiting for her to say something. Anything.

It felt like an eternity before Astoria spoke. Her hands had found their way to fold neatly on her lap and her gaze lowered. "What did it say," she whispered.

Draco took the opportunity to sit on the vanity bench beside her. He looked down at his lap where his fingers nervously fidgeted against each other. "They say it's a blood curse. Blood Malediction. A generational family curse," he explained and glanced up to see her expression. And by the shock on her face, this must've been the first time she heard it.

Shit. As much as Draco hated it, he had hoped Astoria would've known about it. Even if that meant she deceived him into marriage by hiding it from the Malfoys. It would mean that she might possibly know more about it. Perhaps even a cure.

"What else do they know about it," Astoria urged on, scooting closer to him.

Draco sat up slightly and shook his head, turning to look at her. "That's it so far. But they think it only affects women. Thus, why it showed up now," he suggested. And this was the only explanation since the past several generations of Greengrasses have been men.

Astoria nodded slowly and hung her head, her face distorting into a pained expression. It finally hit her. The heaviness of the truth.

Draco reached his hand out to place it over hers as she bit her lip painfully hard as it trembled.

"What now," she breathed out, closing her eyes as she tried to school her emotions.

"There's an experimental treatment they want to try. It's called chemotherapy. It's by Muggles and for them it seems to work. Apparently, they have a similar disease to this curse," he explained, feeling he had said too much, but he didn't want to leave anything out that may bring comfort to his wife. When she just nodded, Draco continued. "They can start you on it next week. If you're willing."

Astoria's eyes seemed to flick up with interest at that statement, staring blankly at her tabletop as she thought. Draco could see the thoughts running through her mind. She was analyzing the situation even in this state. But as the seconds past, Draco couldn't help but fear she may decline. She wasn't one to agree to help. She preferred to sort herself out.

"Okay. I'll do it," she said and nodded firmly. She faced Draco and stared into his silver eyes and Draco watched her green ones in return. 'Thank Merlin' was the only thought that crossed his brain.

He gave her a gentle smile and lifted her hand to place a soft kiss on her deft fingers. "I'll let them know. I'm pleased with your decision. I don't know what Scorpius and I would do if you're not with us," he confessed.

"Hush," she whispered and leaned over, slipping her hand from his grip and reaching up to push back a few of his loose hairs from his face. "I would do anything for this family. For our son. Don't forget that."

He never forgot that, nor will he forget for as long as he lived.

  
Friday morning, Draco stood on the sixth floor of the hospital with the two Healers beside him, waiting. They stood in front of the door to a small room where there was a desk for them to discuss and the machine in the corner to conduct the treatment. Draco felt utterly confused by it, but he was not a Healer right now and he had to learn to put his fate in the specialists.

It wasn't long before he could hear the familiar clicking of heels and cheerful chatter and babbling from down the hall. It wasn't long until Astoria had turned the corner with Scorpius resting on her hip. Both of whom were bundled into their cloaks with rosy cheeks from the cold. A imagine that warmed his heart as he so needed something to.

"Look Scorpius, it's papa," she said, and Draco met her halfway and pecked her lips before running his hand over Scorpius' hair and kissed his head.

"I thought you were going to leave him with my mother," he asked softly, though he was never mad when it came to seeing his child.

Astoria shrugged and bounced their baby slightly, grinning as he let out a pleased gurgle. "I decided to bring him with me. I wanted moral support from my two favourite men," she answered and Draco understood.

"Mrs. Malfoy. We're ready for you. If we could step in, we can start discussing the procedure," one of the Healers said, opening the door of the treatment room for them.

Astoria nodded politely, and Draco placed his hand on her back, leaning close to her ear. "I'll be with you every step of the way. We both will."

With that, courage overcame her, and she stepped forward. Draco took a moment to stand there, watching her introduce herself and Scorpius to the Healers. Her face glowing brightly and he couldn't help but feel calm and at ease.

Unknowing to him, Scorpius wore the same expression of captivation as Astoria chatted away as though there was nothing to fear. And in a sense there wasn't because what was the point of living what life you had left with a dark cloud looming over. For Astoria, she had taught Draco that life was not worth living until he always fought to find the sun.

  
_Dear Scorpius,_

_This may be the first of many letters you may never read. But today, your mother had proved yet again how far she was willing to go for you. For the both of us._  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoped you guys enjoyed the chapter! Just one more note that I couldn't put in the beginning because spoilers:
> 
> \- I skipped Christmas and New Years because I plan on doing them later and didn't want to keep writing the same holidays over and over
> 
> Comments and criticisms and possible scenarios are welcome, as always x


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